“Jesus Doc! I see you’re not wasting any time, huh?” He stumbled inside the partly dark room, he barely stood up straight. Marlena came to catch him from behind but was rejected by his hands “Roman, I’m sorry, it’s just..” she didn’t want to lie to him. Not anymore.

“It’s just that after Stefano’s visit today, I didn’t want to leave her alone tonight” John finished her sentence. He knew that it wasn’t the best idea of telling him the whole truth right now, he’s too drunk and upset.

“Stefano? Was he...was..was he somewhere near you Doc?” Roman turned to look at her, her arms were wrapped around her torso, looking at him, worried. She nodded and walked to stand in front of the big window. She understood why John stopped her but she felt so guilty about lying to him again. She couldn’t face him.

“That bast-“

“Roman” John spoke quickly “everything is all right. She’s fine. Why don’t you sit down? I’ll get you some water, mm?” This was the last thing he wanted to do right now but he knew that this is what Marlena would want. After seeing him like that, he knew she’ll want to let him crash on her couch.

Roman just followed him with hollow eyes.

He got a glance at John’s face while he walked. He looked at Marlena for a millisecond. He recognized that look, that was the same look he used to look at her, he knew how yearning looks like when he saw it.

Damn him, he growled in his mind.

 

He was angry, he wasn’t stupid he was merely drunk. He knew that there was something else going on here, they are lying to him. She’s still lying to him. Standing up he came to stand behind her, she was agitated. Wanting to turn around and face him, he wouldn’t let her. Grabbing both her forearms with a tight grip “you’re lying..to me..you are.. lying” he muttered, his drunk state startled her.

“Roman” her voice broke, she fought the tears with no avail.

“At least..have the courtesy to wait.. to wait for the divorce to go through… you ..oh man you can’t keep it in your pants, is that it?” His grip tightened around her. She wanted to break free but he was right, she was lying to him again, the paint resonate through her arms.

“You… oh, you whore..” he hissed into her ear.

“Roman, that is enough “ John stood behind him, a tall glass of cold water in his hand.

 

“Stay out of it John! I’m speaking with MY WIFE” he emphasized the last words, losing his grip on her arms. She broke free and turned to face him

“I’m sorry” she spoke with tearful eyes “you have every right to be angry...”

“Oh is that so?! Why, thank you, Doctor Evans! For letting me the freedom to feel anger!” He was so furious, his voice was too loud for this time of night and she was afraid one of the neighbors would hear him.

“Roman..” she tried again, Wiping her tears with her fingers.

“I trusted you..I ...I was so stupid… I thought you loved me..” his knees were wobbly, so he grabbed on the piano next to him

“ I do love you” getting closer to him, trying to explain herself

“ONLY ME!”

There were a few seconds of quiet when he looked at John, walking towards him, moving from side to side.

“You… I shouldn’t have trusted you..not after what you did…” he pointed his finger at him. Still drunk he was trying to make sense.

“Roman, I think you should-“

“Shut up John! You! You don’t get to talk now! Not after fucking with my wife.. “ his voice was full of contempt.

Marlena lowered her eyes to the floor. This evening couldn’t get any worse than this and Roman was a man on a mission.

“So how was it, John? Huh? How was it fucking MY WIFE?!” He yelled and got closer to the door.

No one answered. Her sobs were louder now and John just wanted to hold her but he stayed put.

 

Opening the front door, Roman almost fell to the floor, she rushed to him “Roman, please stay, you’re in no condition of going outside by yourself״

 

Ignoring her words he managed to walk two more steps before collapsing on the floor of the corridor.

 

John placed him on her sofa. He was passed out.

The room was finally quiet.

He was the first to speak “Doc, he would be out for the night..I think I’m gonna go now” holding her face with his palms her got closer and kissed her forehead. She nodded.

They walked together towards the door, both of them were so tired and she hated to see him leave but he was right. She has never seen Roman behave that way before and it was her fault.

“John..” placing a gentle hand on his arms “ I don’t think we should see each other until the divorce papers go through.. I’m sorry.. it’s too much for him..” her eyes were wet again.

He pulled her to his warm embrace, whispering in her ear “ I know..it’s all right Doc... I love you”.

 

Two weeks. 336 hours she hasn’t seen him and it ached her soul. Mostly it ached because she was finally in tune with her feelings, but now, now she had to put them aside for a while until her divorce papers got through.

A very grown-up thing to do indeed but sometimes the right thing to do actually feels very wrong.

 

Last time she saw him it was exactly 14 days ago. Her mind wandered off to that terrible night, when Roman showed up at her apartment, drunk and horney, the perfect combo. Or not.

He was raging when he saw John’s there. Nothing she said, nothing John said didn’t calm him down.

The look in his eyes, oh, that agonizing expression he had on, made her heart flinch. She never wanted to hurt him like that, he too was a victim in all of this, in Stefano’s game.

He fell asleep on her couch, she couldn’t bear to send him away.

When she woke up, Roman was gone.

 

Her life came to a very normal standard routine, a routine without John.

She would go to work, come home and go to bed, she knew how depression looks like and it was most definitely a beginning of one.

 

She stepped out of the hospital’s elevator when she ran into Mike Horton. He was happy to see her. It’s been a while since last time they’d spoke and he was eager to hear how’s her mentoring going.

“Marlena, hey! I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever. How you’ve been?” Mike gave her a quick hug and smiled. He knew her for so long, she was one of his dearest friends and colleagues.

 

“Hi Mike” her smile was beaming, she did a great job in covering her true feelings for John. For now.  “ I’m good, you know, same as always. Walk with me?”

They walked down the corridor towards her office

“I’m sorry, I have an early session today” she wanted to explain the quickness.

“It’s ok. Oh, I’ve been meaning to ask you. How’s the mentoring going with Dr. Harington?”

“I’m actually seeing him right now. I wasn’t so sure, to begin with, but now I think it’ll be good for me. Some distraction from all that is going on in my personal life right now, you know..”

She didn’t have to say anymore. He knew what was going on.

“Yes I know, grandma told me yesterday.. I’m so sorry Marlena. I really thought you would be able to work things out..” his voice got lower when they passed her secretary’s desk.

“Thank you” placing her files on her desk, she turned to face him.

He smiled and got closer “ you’re an incredible woman Marlena. I know great things would come to you in the future. You deserve it” holding her hands he squeezed them tightly, trying to comfort her.

“Thank you Mike” she offered him a humbling smile. In the corner of her eyes, she saw Kit standing at the doorway.

“Good morning Marlena, Dr. Horton, I hope I’m not intruding “ Kit stepped into her office, getting closer.

“Good morning Dr. Harington. No, I was just about to leave” Mike turned to her “ I’ll be seeing you. Let’s have lunch sometime this week?”

She smiled, happily, nodding her head.

The hours grew late and they have just finished their last session of the day. Marlena wanted him to join every one of her sessions, take notes, ask questions. She was enjoying his company. He was witty, smart and funny. A good distraction indeed.

The last session was a very harsh case of a woman that had lost her husband in the war. She was crying most of her time there and after she left, Marlena felt drained.

“I want you to go over your notes and see if you have any questions about today’s sessions. All right?” She stood up, fixing her skirt.

He looked at her. Yes, the day was long and tightening but he could look at her all day long. How she sat there, listen to her patients talking, a casual hand going through her golden locks. He was mesmerized.

“No problem Marlena”

Marlena.

He loved saying her name.

“Good” she smiled and it sent goosebumps through his body.

“By the way, it’s late. Do you mind if I escort you to your apartment?” Kit stood up and gathered his things, waiting to hear her -yes.

How gracious, she thought “all right, thank you. Let’s go”

They picked up their belongings and left the office on their way to the parking lot.

“Thank you for that,” she said when they both walked into her penthouse. Her apartment was beautiful and warm just like her.

“ no problem. I was happy to help” he smile, she yawned “oh! I’m so sorry! I guess I’m tired, it’s been such a long day” her fingers went to remove her jacket, undoing the small buttons quickly before discarding it on the sofa.

“ Oh I’m sorry too, I didn’t mean to stay beyond my welcoming “

“Oh no, it’s just fine” her hand lowered to her feet and took off her high heels.

“ why don’t you go upstairs and I’ll go. It’ll lock behind me, right?” Kit grabbed his bag again.

“Yes. Thank you for that and for escorting me home. I’ll see you tomorrow” and with that, she started to climb up the stairs.

“Goodnight Marlena”

“Goodnight Kit”

He reached for the door handle and opened it, his eyes never leaving her body.

She disappeared into one of the corridor upstairs.

He slammed the door.

Closing his eyes with bliss, he inhaled and switched off the light.

He was still inside.